At the beginning of July, I got back to Munich after spending the last two months in Brisbane with my family. I didn’t have any time at all in those two months to do anything artistic for myself, and I was really surprised when after a week here, I was suddenly full of ideas and motivation to paint. Most of my stuff up until now has been digital, and painting IRL was one of those things you try and get into but it never really becomes a habit, or a skill that grows. The bigger the empty space, the more intimidating it is to fill it, was always afraid of wasting supplies in case it didn’t turn out any good. This didn’t happen this time at all. In fact, I enjoyed the experience of not knowing how the picture was going to turn out, so there was no expectations to disappoint. I finally used my new easel (well, second hand but unused), and almost all of the new acrylics I bought last year. I even had to buy some new brushes.

This one I called in my head, Mercutio. I think it was from the music I was listening to – a mixed bag of a playlist I made made Spotify suggest some really interesting songs. How come that Blood, by Sam Amidon made me randomly remember a song I used to listen to by Old Blind Dogs, Edward. I realised they’re both versions of the same old folk song, one about a mother questioning her son about why he’s covered in blood, and it’s revealed he’s killed his father or brother and has to go away. I think there’s a few different versions of it, I guess it’s quite old. But the end of Edward always struck me, because at the end of that one, the mother asks what he will leave her after he forsakes his lands and abandons his family. He replies, a curse from hell for the advice you gave to me. That emotion, that venom reminds me of Mercutio’s death in Romeo and Juliet, when he curses not only Tybalt, who has killed him, but Romeo, who he was trying to defend. Mercutio always struck me as both the most sympathetic and interesting character in that play, and his death is the biggest tragedy to me. He was the one who tried to keep the peace, got along with everyone, but was still a victim of the violence. And at the end, as he realises what has happened, he has nothing but rage and thirst for vengeance left. Don’t know if that’s obvious to see in this painting, but it’s what I was thinking as I painted it.

This one I think of as, A Coward’s End. It started out quite dramatic, as I just decided to splatter some red over the paper. As I got towards the end, I thought of a saying I heard, something about ‘A coward dies a thousand deaths’. Probably some of that was a bit of personal stuff and resentments I’m trying to work through, so this was a bit of catharsis too.

This one I honestly can’t really remember why I did it, I think I started by wanting to make something mirrored but not perfectly symmetrical, then I thought it would be fun to put some hands in. I do really like how it turned out though. I probably need to come up with a better title than Spaceballs.

Updraft: this one I haven’t even scanned and stitched yet. This picture is really not very good quality. I just really wanted to paint some clouds. I do think maybe I went too far with painting the patterns on the cloud, but I’m getting used to it now and I still like it.